What a fucking waste of an outfit
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
two words: eviction party
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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