They should really pass out barf bags in church
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
When did angry sex become our thing?
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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