You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize