I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
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I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
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I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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