when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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