Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I love you. Go after that dick
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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