remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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