i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize