Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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