At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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