HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
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