I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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