I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize