NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize