P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
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I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
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A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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