I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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