It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
only if we run a train.
done.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize