a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I supernannyed him into submission
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize