I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize