I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
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