Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize