You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
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My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I'm determined to sit on that face.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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