I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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