I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
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There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
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It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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