At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
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