shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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