i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
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the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
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Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
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