Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
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