office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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