so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
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And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
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I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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