every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize