Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize