I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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