I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I looked at my own cervix.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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