I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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