i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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