I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
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