Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(214): View more from Texas

Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!

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(512): View more from Texas

Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time

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(206): View more from Washington

The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...

(425): View more from Washington

Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(978): View more from Massachusetts

im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages

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(252): View more from North Carolina

so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.

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(320): View more from Minnesota

how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?

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(714): View more from California

Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots

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