I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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