i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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