Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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