ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I didn't shave. On purpose
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
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there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
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they call him Oral-B. enough said
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
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