so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
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I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
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IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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