Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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