I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Randomize