Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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