They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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