I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize