I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
party gras won. party gras always wins.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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