I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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